Fabulous Friday: Why I dress for Me.


This post is also available in: Nederlands (Dutch)

Some time ago, I mentioned to someone, that I prefer to go to busy restaurants. When I sit in an empty eatery, I miss the hustle and bustle and the feeling of going out. “But of course,” she replied. “You always want to show off. If it is a quiet place, you will not be seen by anyone. That is the reason you dress up.”

Flaunting it without anyone in sight 😉

I felt shocked. In a way, I also felt humiliated. I love fashion. I love going out. But was I considered a shallow person, who could not do any better than show off for the sake of showing off? As this is the time of the corona crisis, I have a lot of time on my hands to contemplate things anyway. It somehow also touched my Calvinist upbringing: doing anything without a good reason is just not okay. Be humble. Never stand out of the crowd. Be invisible.

Over a decade ago, I lived like a hermit. I hardly ever left the house. Projects I had worked on had stopped. I had stopped travelling because of that. We lived in a rented house with very noisy neighbours and desperately wanted to move somewhere else, and needed money to do so. I worked. And worked. We saved and saved. Until we could finally buy a house we loved.

From these years, I learned several things.

  • I can work really hard.
  • I am a great saver.
  • I cannot do without fun, fashion and colours.
  • (But I could also be a hermit for a while).

Going out, dressing up, enjoying fabrics, shades – to me it is about enjoying myself. And that feels great. I do not wish to be shamed for my innocent pleasures. I do not need anyone’s approval.

To me, dressing well has to do with selfcare. Self-love. For others, it is just shallow vanity. So be it. You can’t please everyone, so you gotta please yourself.

This post is also available in: Nederlands (Dutch)


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